The ideas I read about intrigued me, so I took an online “test” to see how this approach might work for me. As part of the test, I was asked to choose my Top 3 from a long list of qualities or characteristics that I value most.
My choices were: Autonomy, Belonging, Sensitivity
My goal is to bring these values in a real way to my daily life. In the free report I requested about my test results, some initial suggestions were provided to help me meet that goal. Naturally, I saw a way to use an Oracle or Tarot deck with this approach!
First of all, the report stated that my answers to the questions indicate that:
- I often get hooked or stuck in my emotions, thoughts, and experiences – both by bottling them and pushing them aside, brooding on them and over-analyzing them, or by holding on to self-stories in ways that might not serve me.
- I have fairly low levels of self-compassion.
Guilty as charged.
The idea is that I can make changes to my habits and situation so that I see greater levels of growth and development in connection with those key values of Autonomy, Belonging, and Sensitivity. In turn, this leads to greater levels of thriving and overall life success.
The Oracle of Visions by Ciro Marchetti (U.S. Games Systems, Inc.) seemed eager to assist me in this endeavor. To read my review of this amazing deck, click HERE.
So – let’s see what insight I can get into how I can do a better job of bringing those three key values in a real way to my daily life.
I do feel the need to provide my definition of the terms I am using:
Autonomy: independence from the will of others; independence in one's thoughts or actions
Belonging: acceptance as a natural member or part, as in “a sense of belonging”; feeling connected to others at a deep level
Sensitivity: an awareness and understanding of the feelings of other people
(In writing out these definitions, I had to laugh. The first one seems almost the antithesis of the other two, begging the question: Can you be autonomous while also belonging and feeling/expressing sensitivity toward others? Offhand, it sounds like it could be challenging…)
Here is the spread I designed:
(1) How can I do a better job of bringing Autonomy in a real way to my daily life?
(2) How can I do a better job of bringing Belonging in a real way to my daily life?
(3) How can I do a better job of bringing Sensitivity in a real way to my daily life?
(4) How can I raise my levels of self-compassion?
(5) How can I do a better job of dealing with my emotions, thoughts, and experiences?
(6) Overall message or advice – something I need to keep in mind.
And here is the reading:
CARD 11 / Harmony, Balance, Being in Tune with Others
“You don’t get harmony when everybody sings the same note.” – Doug Floyd
This is a fascinating card here. The definition of autonomy I am using is “independence from the will of others” and the quote linked with Card 11 is about “being in tune with others” yet not being “the same as” or being “dependent on” others. This card suggests to me that being autonomous doesn’t necessarily mean going against or “fighting” others. I can refuse to bow to the influence of others while still harmonizing with them, achieving a balance. Harmonizing does not require me to be dependent.
CARD 25 / Misleading Illusion, Confusion
“Do not be misled by what you see around you, or be influenced by what you see. You live in a world which is a playground of illusion, full of false paths, false values and false ideals. But you are not part of that world.” – Sai Baba
My reaction to this card is that it indicates my feelings of belonging or not belonging may be an illusion or that perhaps I need to be aware that perceptions can be false. It is easy to be misled. Perhaps I need to do a better job of evaluating how or where I do belong or do not belong. I know that I made mistakes in the past in this area, seeking to feel a sense of belonging in a setting that simply didn’t make sense based on who I really am. I wonder if this card is advising me to avoid doing that again, to question whether I really want to “belong” somewhere in the first place instead of fretting over feelings of not belonging.
CARD 8 / Goals, Dedication, Process
“When we are motivated by goals that have deep meaning, by dreams that need completion, by pure love that needs expressing, then we truly live life.” – Greg Anderson
The person on this card is an alchemist, striving to “achieve an end goal through study, experimentation, dedication and perseverance.” That is an interesting approach to the issue of bringing Sensitivity to my daily life. It suggests that doing so needs to be a conscious goal that I work toward and focus on. It is perhaps not something that “comes naturally” to me for whatever reason.
CARD 46 / Connections, Putting the Pieces Together, Coming to Conclusions
“To the question of your life you are the answer, and to the problems of your life you are the solution.” – Joe Cordare
Raising my levels of self-compassion may be like putting the pieces of a puzzle together, finding connections and relationships as I discover more about myself. I confess that in my mind “self-compassion” sounds like feeling sorry for oneself, making excuses for oneself, or avoiding responsibility for less-than-desirable behavior and actions. In other words, I resist doing that, and as a result, have a really hard time being compassionate toward myself. Only I can solve this dilemma.
CARD 30 / Danger, Fear
“Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. The fearful are caught as often as the bold.” – Helen Keller
A very powerful message here. The questions to ask when dealing with my emotions, thoughts, and experiences are:
- What do those emotions, thoughts, and experiences really mean?
- Are those emotions, thoughts, and experiences reliable or do I need to question them?
- Do I need to revise my responses to those emotions, thoughts, and experiences?
CARD 36 / Entrapment, Limitations, Restrictions, Complications
“We have more ability than willpower, and it is often an excuse to ourselves that we imagine that things are impossible.” – François de La Rochefoucauld
The angel shown on this card cannot fly. Her wings are entangled by “troubles, obstacles and fear.” She is blinded by anxiety and fails to see that she could cut her ties using the nearby sword and set herself free. In my birth chart, the planet Saturn (lessons, limitations) is in my First House (House of Self), which I think has something to do with my tendency to entangle myself in troubles, obstacles, and fear. I am not “blaming” my chart, simply observing that this placement of Saturn is in keeping with the general idea of placing restrictions or limits on oneself. At times the obstacles I perceive are real, but often they are imagined. Either way, it is possible to face and overcome those obstacles.
I am honestly seriously impressed with the cards that came forward in this reading and the performance of this deck in general. I will be consulting it again!
To learn more about the book Emotional Agility, click HERE. To take the test, click HERE.